Handwriting From the Past

Today I am getting organized.  The office always seems the last to get TLC, so on a rainy Saturday it seems the thing to do.  My biggest issue is the stack of CDs waiting to be imported to iTunes so that I can finally send them off to Goodwill.  Who listens to CDs anymore?

Music holds memories...highschool, college, and a trip to Europe many, many, many years ago.  I guess I could look at this task one of two ways - (1)great memories or (2)that I am getting old.  Especially as I download The Cranberries.  (Are they around at all?)

But, the biggest surprise came when I opened a R.E.M. cd.  It took my breath away as I looked at the initials marked by a sharpie more that 17 years ago.  Not my own initials, but GSB - Gregory Scott Blauwkamp.  My big brother.  The letters are formed just the way I remembered them - from a hand that was very meticulous and trained in engineering ways.  But, as I looked a bit longer, I also saw the letters written from a young hand, probably 20 at the time.  I haven't seen that handwriting in a 17 years and sadly, I never will again.  It shocks me that my own handwriting has changed to show time and years, yet these three letters stay young.

We've all heard the words 'only the good die young.' In many ways, dying young saves us from the hardships of growing old.  But it also takes away many dreams - from the one that is gone and from the ones who spent many days looking at that young child and wondering what they would accomplish. 

On this cold, rainy Saturday, I wonder where Greg would be if the car accident wouldn't have happened.  Would he be proud of his little sister?  Would he still think I was annoying, as big brothers often do?  I miss him everyday and I thank God for little presents...like three handwritten letters from long ago.

Happy Birthday to Jeb! FIVE!

I have to admit, this birthday kind of crept up on me and I think it's because I was avoiding it!  I mean, Jeb is my baby and a five year old really isn't considered that anymore! 

So, we did a little family birthday party and had Jeb's favorite dinner - pancakes.  There isn't much choice when you really only like 3 things. So, we all carbed up.  After, we opened the gifts that Amazon.com so generously delivered in the knick of time.  Jeb was so excited and the best thing was when he asked his brothers if they would like to share his new Razor 360.  'Share' to them means that they can just have it.  One of the few disadvantages to being the youngest - anything can be taken away at any time...even on your birthday.

New toy!

I was hoping that was it for celebrations, but every time we went to preschool,  Jeb would point to someone and say 'Hey, see you at my birthday party.'  WHAT?!? We are having a party?  I really thought I had avoided this!  But, after sitting Jeb down and asking just how many people he invited (about 20), we decided to have a small party.  I am a sucker.


The party was a week later with 5 boys in addition to Jeb (you turn five, so you get five attendees!).  The party was at our house with all the classic party games.  We welcomed the boys in and started by racing cars.  Everything was timed to the minute and I was so proud of Jeb for not being wild.  Lunch was even more tame...this was going well.  And then it happened.  In the middle of 'Pin the Tail on the Donkey', he laid down.  Then his hand went to his mouth and I flew into action.  False alarm, but I knew he was sick...or going to be.  Thankfully, a friend was helping me.  I put Jeb to bed and she took the party outside. He came out every once in awhile to check on the party's progress. It was a great party, even if Jeb was laying on the ground when he was with the kids.  The boys had a blast and they went home with their party bags and a big serving of hand sanitizer.

All the boys - before Jeb went down

Poor Jeb...laying down a minute after the pinata...

A birthday to remember...or not.  What happened next is for another blog entry.  Let's just say, my feet paid the price.  Happy Birthday Jeb!  We love you - no matter how your stomach feels!